Stress » Barbara Berg

The Importance of Being Kind During Stressful Times

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It’s hard not to notice how stressed so many of us appear to be, one way or another. Whether it is at work (if you still have a job), on the freeways (with lots of pot holes), or just vying for a parking spot, we all seem to be taking in the notion that life as we know it is changing; and it all feels “a little strange.”

During this interesting time period on planet Earth where birds are falling out of the sky and everyone seems to be holding their breath for some “group consensual reason,” it is so important to remember that the best lift we can give and receive is to find a way to connect.

Being the truly “kindred spirits” that we are, is the quickest way to connect and bring joy and abundance in your direction in so many ways.

Notice how the word kind is in kindred; this is for good reason. When you are around your kindred spirits and when you are being one, you feel loved, safe, at home, and important to each other.

Kindness warms the heart and gives us hope; and in a time when we are all too aware of the remnants of greed, it is so easy to go into lack mode and become unknowingly stingy with our smiles and moments of kind touch.

If ever there was a time to think about connecting with people today in some way just to let them know they are important in your life, it is NOW.

Whether it is your best friend or someone you bump into at the water cooler:

  • Write them a post-it note
  • Send a card
  • Email a personal message, or
  • Make a plan to actually go see them and give them a hug– – they need it and so do you; especially if things aren’t going all that well between the two of you right now.

Let someone know you care.  As close as we may think we are to someone, we never really do know when they are standing on their last nerve. Be a kindred spirit today and be as kind as you can. Kindness saves lives, hearts, souls and spirits, especially now.

Truly connecting with others is one of the few things that help to reduce stress. When you give another person a warm and caring look that lets you each know “we are all in this together,” everything just gets more “doable,” no matter what it is.

Finally, kindness involves connecting, even if you haven’t connected with a certain person recently or so well before. Surprise them. You just might get a positive surprise back that will lead you to a bridge you didn’t know you had or needed!

What suggestions do you have?

Things, Ideas, People and Places to Cherish

Happiness, appreciation of self and others, and pure joy are aspects that make life worth living.  In fact, they may be the key to understanding what is meaningful in your daily existence.

Things you can cherish are thoughts, statements, and pictures in your mind that you can access when times are rough.

  • People, pets, places, concepts and ideas you believe to be true could also be cherished for the joy they bring into your life.

The more memories, feelings and moments or heartfelt love you have to cherish, the easier it will be to gather hope on a day when you especially need it.  If you were falling in an airplant about to crash and you flashed your most joyous thoughts and moments in your mind, what would they be?

Write down the things you cherish.  Be as spontaneous as possible.  Try to allow yourself to consider those pictures that come to your mind freely.  Don’t determine what you should or should not be thinking. A wonderful exercise when feeling stressed and you need to bring in some positive energy.

Achieve a Winners Attitude..Overcome Self Doubt

MAN W THUMBS UP

In reality we all need a break from the intensity of complex and stressful relationships from time to time.  That’s not to say, however, that intimate relationship problems don’t require an immediate response of some sort.  They usually do. You might want to respond by saying, “Let’s work through this problem, then we’ll take time to sort out other issues. “  These statements can help you stay calm while gaining time to gather your thoughts so you can make effective decisions.

Overtime, you may decide to call back, have a deep discussion, write a letter, explain your position, or just let the relationship drift off.  It depends on your closeness to the person and the intensity of your dilemma.  Although it’s good to have closure or full healing in relationships, it’s not always possible right away, especially if there appears to be no mutual respect or meeting of the minds.

Sometimes everything clears up years later, and sometimes situations are best left unfinished until you are able to effectively express your feelings and muddle the situation further.  Looking at the “big picture” as well as examining how your buttons are being pushed, may lead you to realize you have internal issues to work out.  The dilemma may be more about you than your relationship problems with the other person.  Overcome self doubt and take time-out from discussing the subject may be a good idea.

  • Consider for a moment the irony in your chattering monkeys.  Oddly enough down the road when you look back, the things you’re going through right now will make some sort of sense in your life story.
  • Choose your mentors well.  Make certain they have sound judgment.  It also makes sense to seek help from people you feel comfortable around and can relate to honestly.  If you are disappointed with the initial help or advice, get another opinion or consider altering your perspective.  When you are seeking help, prepare to receive new ideas and suggestions. Put a ring on your right index finger and let the positive energy flow in.
  • Choose all your future friends and jobs carefully, for they are the vehicles through which you will learn more about yourself.  Be alert for red flags–people or jobs which may represent negative distractions or lessons with high price tags.
  • Do something physical.  Take a long walk, run around the block a few times or play tennis. Once you get started, you may enjoy it. In addition, taking interesting classes, or singing in a chorus will enliven you.  Singing in the shower is a great way for releasing pent-up feelings and energy.  Commit to something physically exerting regularly.
  • Create positive, empowering alternatives for negative ones that pop up in your mind.
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